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Archive for the category “Books”

MONDAY MUSING

By @hmsbeefnuts

It happened a few weeks ago now, and which seems like ages. Millions of words have been written and spoken about it. Bitching, cheering, fear, hope, all seems to be in the mix when discussing the biggest news to hit the Geek community for, well, maybe ever. I am of course referring to Disney’s acquisition of George Lucas’ company, Lucasarts. It was about time that someone here at All Geek To Me wrote some thoughts on this huge story, so I elected myself to write it.

I don’t have a problem with Disney, in fact, I kind of love it, I think they do a great job with the franchises they control, from ones they created themselves, to the ones they have bought, such as The Muppets and of course Marvel Comics. They seem to show a great deal of respect for all of their individual fans and one just needs to look at The Avengers to see how Disney can treat a massive franchise, beloved of fans world wide, with a hands off attitude. Disney are obviously in the business of making loads of cash, and they don’t want to fuck up huge franchises like Star Wars, and Indiana Jones, in fact, a trip around Disneyland will reassure you that Disney is the exact place for these specific franchises. Star Tours and the Indiana Jones rides are some of my favourite attractions in Disney, you can tell they care about and realise the importance of these films and characters.

I’m sure that we can look forward to a Star Wars Land, or even a whole Star Wars Theme Park in the future, and I for one can’t wait. As for the movies, I look forward to Episodes VII, VIII, IX and all the future movies have the potential to be excellent. Of course, they ould be awful, but then without the direction of Lucas, Star Wars gets a chance to breathe. I don’t happen to hate the prequels, I think that Revenge of the Sith is the best Star Wars movie, but I don’t think you can deny that Lucas can not direct actors. He is however a great ideas man. Give new Star Wars movies to the likes of Brad Bird, Del Toro, Spielberg or Peter Jackson, and I can’t wait to see the results.

All in all this is a very exciting time for fans of Star Wars, and I’m sure we can look forward to more and more epic announcements from Disney in the coming months and years, I have but one request, no fucking Jar-Jar.

Autumn of Terror: Scary Reads

By Geeky Gem

As Autumn of Terror nears its end, I have decided to look at some books that I have read that are classed as horror books. The ones on this list are just a few of the ones I have read and I have read loads of books not just horror but a whole heap more.

The Shining by Stephen King

This was one of the first King books I ever read and I loved it. My mum got it for me one Christmas and the thought of a family moving to hotel for work seemed a bit a dull. However my mum said it was a good book and so I cracked open the cover and boy she was not wrong. It’s a fantastic book and has lots of different twist’s in it I couldn’t put it down and have passed it on for other to enjoy.

I am Legend  by Richard Matheson

As with many books I read, I some times only get to them as Hollywood announce a big screen adaptation. I do however always tend to finish the book before I see the movie. So I only got to this as the version starring Will Smith went into production. I enjoyed the book a lot more than the movie. These vampires are nasty, and they do every thing they can to make life harder (as being the last man alive wasnt had enough) for Robert Neville.

Let the Right One In by John Ajvide Lindqvist

Now this book has been made into two very different movies and both movies are good but if you enjoy reading then you have to give this one a go. It’s really good and what seems like a simple story is actually very dark. At the heart of the story it’s about a boy meeting a girl and wanting to spend all his time with her but it’s so much darker than that as the girl will do anything to keep him safe, but what is she?

The Woman in Black by Susan Hill

I only read this book earlier in the year and I loved it. It’s brillaintly gothic and fantastic in every way, I couldn’t put it down and have since passed it on to some one else to read. There was just something about it that wouldn’t let me put it down, the movie adaptation is also very good. The other thing I liked about this book is it’s a small book which made reading it very quick . The setting is prefect and the story is fantastic.

Anno Dracula by Kim Newman

If you have ever read Empire magazine then you know who Kim Newman is, if you know this you are cool. If you don’t that ok, Kim Newman is a movie citric that has a thing for horror, so he thought he would write a book and what a book it was. If you like Kim Newman then you have to read this and you have to follow him on twitter as he is really funny. I don’t want to mention too much as you really have to read.

Well there we have it a short trip thought some fantastic horror books that I have read and enjoyed very much. Happy reading.

Autumn Of Terror: Classic Horror Novels

By @hmsbeefnuts

Autumn of Terror keeps on trucking like that big truck from Duel,down the highway of October. Only stopping once a day to deposit a blog and then ever onwards to November. Todays blog takes us back before there was electronic entertainment, before movies, before video games, when people had to read books in order to be transported to different worlds, that, or visit the local Opium Den. Anyway, this intro has become mired in awkward metaphor and strange references. Today, I hope you will enjoy my list of Classic Horror novels that have thrilled and inspired readers for hundreds of years, so lets get our book on shall we?

Dracula by Bram Stoker

I guess this would be the big one, the one most people will know, but it was not the first, and for my money, not the best on this list. Dracula is however, a fantastic read. I have read this book a few times and it always draws me in. If you have never read it, but have seen the numerous movies etc. I would definitely recommend reading the original, as it might be quite different to what you are expecting. Written as a series of journal entries and letters, from different perspectives, the story of the Transylvanian Vampire, who seeks a new home in Britain, and runs afoul of his greatest nemesis Professor Van Helsing, is a stone cold classic gothic horror novel. Sexy, scary, exciting, this book runs at a breakneck pace, particularly at the end. I highly recommend this book if you haven’t read it, and why not read it again, if you already have, it’s almost Halloween after all.

Frankenstein; Or The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley

Written during a ghost story contest whilst on holiday with her husband and Lord Byron, Mary Shelley clearly beat both men hands down when it came to hugely successful gothic horror behemoths. The tale of a scientist who wants to create life in his own unique style, Frankenstein is a classic of the horror genre. I will be honest and say that I didn’t initially like this book on the first read, but I gave it another chance, and it clicked for me. I think what I found off-putting at first was it was quite a bit different to what I had imagined it would be from all the films based on the book, I had watched. In the novel, Adam, or the monster, is not a shuffling moaning monster, as in the Universal films, but a scheming and intelligent threat to his creator. The novel may be seen as quite tame now, but must have been very controversial at the time. There are few novels more gothic-y than Frankenstein, and as such, it should be enjoyed on a cold, dark autumn night, whilst the wind blows and the rain pours, next to a roaring fire, in a grand drawing-room.

(The) Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson

This was the first novel on this list that I read, when I was around 9 I think. It scared me, especially the cover of my copy which I could not find, but the painting of a simian looking man, in top hat and cane spotlighted in moonlight. The book itself is the tale of a good scientist who wants to release mans potential, but ends up unleashing mans animalistic murderous side. I suppose the scariest aspect of this novel is the suggestion that everyone has the potential to unleash the scary brutish nature that normally we keep to ourselves, just look at Dr Bruce Banner.

The Hound of The Baskervilles by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

My personal favourite book on this list, The Hound of the Baskervilles has been read and re-read by me countless times. There is just something about this story that I can’t get enough of. The story concerns the recent death of a Devonshire Lord, seemingly at the hands of a spectral hound, when the new Lord of the manor arrives to take up residence in Baskerville Hall, Sherlock Holmes is called in to offer advice and protection from the hell hound, or other evil forces. I do love detective fiction, and Holmes is the top guy in the field. When Conan Doyle added his love of the paranormal to his most beloved character, it was quite simply dynamite. Nothing would be scarier than being on a moor in the middle of the night and hearing that long mournful howl.

The Lodger by Marie Belloc Lowndes

This book was influenced by the Jack the Ripper murders and concerns a similar serial killer dubbed The Avenger. A strange man moves into a lodging house, who’s owners are down on their luck. He pays his way and suddenly their fortunes turn around, but he keeps odd hours, and acts very strangely. Meanwhile, a series of ghastly murders takes place, who could be responsible for said crimes? Well, obvious really isn’t it? But that does not detract from the greatness of this novel, which is gripping to the last. As I am fascinated by the whole Jack the Ripper mystery, I loved this novel, but I think even if you knew nothing about the Ripper murders, this book is still well worth checking out.

Autumn of Terror: My Favourite Monsters Part 2

By @hmsbeefnuts

Yesterday I brought you part one of a two part blog about my favourite versions of all the classic monsters. Well guess what? Here is part two, so you know the deal, here comes some more monsters that I love, and some more honourable mentions that I love almost, but not quite, as much. Part One can be found here. Part Two starts…. Now.

ZOMBIES

Zombies really don’t have that much in the name of variety. You have your standard undead, raised by magic, meteorites or simply if Hell is full with souls, and your voodoo type slave zombies. I happen to like the undead type, and what better, more horrible zombies than the Nazi variety. Call of Duty is a great game and the zombie mode is always fun. The scary thing about zombies is that on there own, they can be quite manageable, it is only when there are a crowd that things become a problem. When that crowd comes running screaming towards you, dressed like nazis, shit has really hit the fan, all one can hope is the magic box grants you a ray gun…

HONOURABLE MENTION

Little girl rage zombies, well that is just scary as shit right?

WITCHES

Responsible for more children’s nightmares than any other monster on this list, The Wicked Witch of the West is the perfect embodiment of evilness. Green skin, perfect witchy outfit, broom stick, hatred of children and general goodness, and if that’s not enough, she has flying blue monkey soldiers, and it doesnt get more evil than that.

HONOURABLE MENTION

The head witch is very scary. That moment when she takes her face off, absolutely terrifying, and she looks grotesque. Imagine waking up to that? No thanks.

MUMMIES

I like my Mummies wrapped in bandages and the Hammer mummy looks creepiest to me. Boris Karloff may be one of my favourite horror actors, but then so is Christopher Lee, and his eyes are way creepier than the Universal Mummy.

HONOURABLE MENTION

If Karloff had stayed in the bandages all the way through the film, he would have been my ultimate choice, however, he doesn’t and is quickly portrayed as a Dracula type figure. Love that black and white picture though.

MR. HYDE

I have always loved this look for Mr. Hyde. Very simian looking, very primal, and a brilliant transformation scene. It has to be this version of Hyde, it is the greatest.

HONOURABLE MENTION

Forget the film, the comic version of this Mr  Hyde is king. The way he deals with the invisable man alone proves this.

HUNCHBACK

Lon Chaney Snr. old school make up job, say no more.

HONOURABLE MENTION

Bela Lugosi played an evil hunchback assisstant in Son of Frankenstein, almost the best.

WEDNESDAY WHIMSY

By @hmsbeefnuts

Hello, welcome back. This week I am going to focus on books, comic books and the normal type. I don’t usually have a lot of time for reading, but recently, I have found myself reaching for a few books, and even finishing them! I know, how exciting. It is true, the majority of these books have been graphic novels, but still, they count, they definitely count. So without too much fuss, lets just get on with this blog shall we?

BATMAN THE BLACK MIRROR

This was the first time I had read a Batman story that didn’t involve Bruce Wayne, apart from the Knightfall saga. Dick Grayson is our Batman in this tale of serial murder, crime bosses, dead whales, villain auctions and sons gone bad. I would not want to spoil anything for you, it really is that good. At first I wasn’t sure if Batman would be as compelling without Bruce Wayne, but I needn’t have worried. Dick Grayson is a different kind of character, but no less compelling as the Dark Knight. His past as Robin, Nightwing and a police officer in Bludhaven all come in to play in some sublime story telling by Scott Snyder. In many ways this is the first comic since Batman: Year One that features the Gordon character in such a brilliant way. His story is just as compelling as Batman’s and sometimes even more so. This is one of the best Batman graphic novels I have ever read, and I really didn’t think I would be saying that about a Batman comic that didn’t have Bruce Wayne in it. I urge everyone with an interest in Batman to seek this out, it really is rather special.

OLD MAN LOGAN

In the world of the future, there are no heroes anymore. Most of them have died, and the few who are left aren’t in the hero business anymore. Logan AKA Wolverine, is older, has a family, and hasn’t popped his claws since the supervillains took over. He works a farm that is under the control of The Hulks, and he owes them a lot of rent money. When Clint Barton AKA Hawkeye comes to him with a proposition, Logan takes the seemingly easy job, so he can get the Hulks off his back. Basically a futuristic western, this has The Man With No Name flavour all over it. It is a fantastic tale, which I will not spoil here, that shows us the end of the Marvel heroes as we know them, and an adventure with Logan and Hawkeye. the first of which refuses to release his anger and claws, but you just know that at some point, someone is going to push him too far, he is Wolverine after all. I loved this book, and I would recommend it to anyone. As it doesn’t take place in comic continuity, you don’t need to know loads about the Marvel Universe but a basic knowledge will serve you well.

THE INFINITY GAUNTLET

As soon as I saw The Avengers (I refuse to call it Marvel’s Avengers Assemble), I knew I had to find out who that purple dude with a massive jaw line was. Well turns out he is Thanos, the Mad God, and this was the most recognisable Thanos book out there. Basic story is, after collecting all the Infinity Gems, and placing them in the Infinity Gauntlet, Thanos tries to impress his lady love Death. The gauntlet and gems give him ultimate power over everything and everyone in the universe and beyond, a power he uses to try to get the attention of the afore-mentioned Death. Of course this causes many problems for the heroes of Earth and beyond, so it’s time for a huge super hero smack down to stop Thanos before he destroys everything. This was my first proper taste of intergalactic Marvelness, and I have to say, it was pretty amazing. I love a good hero team up, and when all of Earths mightiest heroes team up with the galaxies strongest, fun is sure to be had. I will admit to not knowing a few of the characters back stories, but as I have been reading some classic Marvel recently, I knew most of the characters featured. I think that sometimes, diving in to a graphic novel fresh, can be a bit daunting, but it pays off often, and leads you on to discover more amazing adventures featuring characters you may never have thought about before. The Infinity Gauntlet is well worth checking out, particularly if you have an interest in the possible future direction of Marvel Phase Two movies.

That’s just about it for this week, I’ll see you again next week for more Whimsy of a Wednesday variety.

Page Vs Picture

By Geeky Gem

Over the last 5 page vs picture articles, i have taken you deep into the wizarding world of Harry Potter and today is now different as we near the end of time with J.K Rowlings wonderful boy wizard and his friends. I am currently re-reading Prisoner of Azkaban and I have to say I am enjoying it as much as I did the first time. however this is not the book we came here to talk about today, today we reach the penultimate book in the series. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Now as with all the book so far this one picks up where the last book left off, Lord Voldemort has returned and his wrath has been felt in both the Muggle (non-magical) and Wizarding worlds. This where dark secrets are revealed and the death of one of the biggest characters had people all over the world in tears. Such is the impact of this book, that people didn’t even see it coming and that is a testament to Rowling as a writer. This again was one of the books I just couldn’t wait to get my hands and the day my pre ordered book came I think I disappeared for a few good hours and yes its sad to say I booked the da off work for it.

A lot of the characters return for this book as well with Snape making the Unbreakable Vow with Narcissa (Draco’s mother), that he will assist and protect Draco. But what has the Dark Lord asked Darco to do? And who is the mysterious Half-Blood Prince that Harry is learning some magic secrets from, through a book he found. These are not all the questions you ask yourself as you read this book, What is Slughorn hiding from Harry and everyone else at Hogwarts? All these questions and more will be answered as you read the book. This is the year Harry will earn more about Voldemort than he has ever known before an all because Dumbledore feels Harry is ready. Its taking a long time for us to come to the point where we start to find out the truth and everything starts to tie up nicely in this book as things are about to kick off in Deathly Hallows.

The one thing that you find out more about in this book is the Pensieve that Dumbledore keeps in his office, this allows you to look at memories of people, in this case they are all about Lord Voldemort. We also, as does Harry about some very dark magic called a Horcruxes. In which a person can split their soul in place them in objects, in theory helping them live on as long as the objects do. At the end of the book Harry decides he will not be going to school foe his final year but will hunt for the other Horcruxes. This ended left me speechless, and I all I could think are you made Harry. However I was also super excited to read the next book. Shall we move on to the movie?

 

The movie version of Half-Blood Prince came out in 2009 and marked the begging of the end of the movie franchise. David Yates was the director behind this one with writing credits going to Steve Kloves as it has been for all the movies in this series. To be honest I think he does a cracking job on all the movies, he has a way of putting in everything you needed to know from J.K Rowlings books without leaving feel like he missed a big chunk out. Ok, yes some things are different they always will be.

Many of the same cast return again with very few changes, they are however joined by Jim Broadbent as Professor Horace Slughorn and guess what he doesn’t teach Defence Against the Dark Arts, that job has finally gone to Snape. Slughorn is the new Potions teacher, Harry takes his class as he dreams of being an Auror when he leaves Hogwarts.

The reason I like this movie, as with the book you start to learn more about Voldemort and why he became the dark wizard that he did, you also start to see Harry grow up in a way that you never thought. For a moment in time he is fueled by ure hatred and revenge as a character that means a lot to him dies. This is yet another blow to Harry and his world becomes red and anger as he takes off after the murderer. A tense battle with Draco also happens and this is also a dark moment for Harry that is not to say that a Harry v Draco battle hadn’t been coming for a while as it had. It was brilliant, i don’t know what else I can say. This movie and book where both fantastic and the epicness of it all is just to much. However there can be no draw in page vs picture.

So this time my pont goes to book, bringing the score up to Book – 4, Film – 2. Sorry film your losing here and that’s not good. I do have loads more of these to be done so maybe film can bring it back. Why not come back and see.

My Geeky Trivia

By Geeky Gem

I have read a lot of books and many are turned into big budget movies, some do so well that the rights for all the books are bought and turned into some of the biggest franchise’s out there. For example Harry Potter, Twilight and Lord of the Rings to name a few. Others however are good books and maybe get one movie from the series made and that’s it, well so far anyway, rumor has it that the second book in the series The Sea of Monsters is currently filming, which is what, happened to this week’s subject, Percy Jackson and the Lighting Thief.

 

 

In Greek mythology, Chiron was a centaur and a master of the healing arts, and passed that knowledge on to the mortal hero Asclepius.

When they drive off from the Casino, they are in a Maserati, which happens to have the trident as emblem.

 

Luke is seen playing the multiplayer mode of Call of Duty: Mordern Warfare 2. Kevin McKidd is a voice actor for that videogame.

 

In Greek mythology, the goddess Athena is a symbol of virginity. She never had any children.

 

When Chiron is calling for the campers to gather around to go over the rules for Capture the Flag, he yells for Dylan and Paris to stop “lollygagging”. Chiron is played by Pierce Brosnan, whose two younger sons are named Dylan and Paris.

 

The statue of Athena at the Parthenon in Tennessee has a carving of Medusa on her chest plate.

 

The substitute teacher, Mrs. Dodds, writes, “I understand a fury in your words But not your words” from Othello 4.2 on the blackboard. Shortly thereafter, she turns into a Fury.

 

In Greek Mythology Medusa was turned into a Gorgon because her great beauty lead to her being raped by Poseidon, Percy’s father, in the temple of Athena, Annabeth’s mother, who took offense and cursed her. Hence Medusa’s hatred for them, and her reference to unfinished business.

 

Percy was named, by his mother, after Perseus, Zeus’ demigod son, and therefore Percy’s cousin, who battled against Medusa, cutting off and collecting her head, which Percy also does. Perseus then gives the head to Athena, Annabeth’s mother, who places it on her shield, the Aegis.

 

Chiron was also known for training several heroes: Asclepius, Aristaeus, Ajax, Aeneas, Actaeon, Caeneus, Theseus, Achilles, Jason, Peleus, Telamon, Perseus, and Heracles.

 

I really hope they are making Sea of Monster’s as I really enjoyed the books, and the first film wasn’t too bad either. Join me next week for more trivia.

 

 

Page Vs Picture

By Geeky Gem

Now so far on our journey though page to screen we have covered the first four Harry potter books. Today is no different, as we enter the world of book five and things get even darker for Harry and his friends at Hogwarts.

As always we shall start with the book.

I have to admit something here and as I say it I hang my head in shame, I found this book very hard to get into at first. This may have been due to the fact I bought it on relase day but didnt pick it up for a while after as I went on holiday and accidently left it behind, how stupid was that? As that happened many of my friends had finished the book before I got back and as they are good friends tired to keep  my read spoiler free. This did not however stop them from bugging me on how far had I got.

For those of you who have not read the book here is a brief summery of the events take place at Hogwarts during year five. Harry is spending another awful summer with the Dursley’s when he is forced to preform the Patronus charmon some Dementors in front of Dudley, this results in his exploitation from Hogwarts. However as always some one has Harry back’s and he allowed to appeal against this decision at the Ministry of Magic.

When Harry gets back to Hogwarts he finds Dumbledore will not speak to him and is pushing him away, Harry is unsure why, so he seeks help from other places. Sirius being one of these places. The Ministry thinks Hogwarts is going down hill, so sends in Dolores Umbridge to sort the school out. This leads to Harry and his friends forming Dumbledore’s Army, in order to keep themselves safe. Which leads to a huge confrontation in the Ministry itself and the first death since Harry’s parents to happen in the book.

As I said above I found this one really hard to get into and I didn’t finish it in the time scale that I had the others, it took me a lot longer to read. I know it was a longer book as they got bigger each time, but this one was a hard read, but no less enjoyable. Shall we move on to the film?

Frist up there is another director change in this movie, David Yates steps up to the mark on this one. Also for the first time in the movie fanchise so far, Steve Kloves does not write the screenplay, this time it’s Michael Goldenberg who I felt follows Kolves style.

There are very few cast changes in this one but there are some wonderful addtions, in Luna Lovegood and Nymphadora Tonks to name a few. There is also the nasty but brillaintly played, Dolores Umbridge. Again I feel I have to be honest and say this is not my favourtie of the movies, this one has so much talking and set up in it for the last three that in a few places it can be a bit boring. However that being said my all time favourite scene takes place in this movie and that is the exit scene of Fred and George from Hogwarts, it is fantastic.

Now I feel it’s time to answer the question, as always, which is better, the book or the film? The current score is a tie at 2 a piece. This one is harder than the others, as I struggled with both, please dont think that I dont like them as I do, I really do, it was just hard going. Anyway to aswer the question which is better? I think I am going to have to go with book this time, and this is due to the simple fact there is a little bit more back story about Neville in the book, which is not seen in the movie and I wish it had been there as it makes the character so much deeper.

Now the score is Book – 3 Film – 2. Can film bring it back? Come back and check it out soon. Until then, happy watching and happy reading.

All Geek To Me’s Geek Olympics: Final Round

By @hmsbeefnuts

Hello Geek Sport’s fans, and welcome to another, slightly delayed, post covering the greatest Geek Character’s competing in a series of events, loosely based on Olympic sports. You can read the first article here, and the second here. So without further a do, here we go…

HAMMER THROW

Thor, The Hammer Bros. Timmy Mallet, Greg ‘The Hammer’ Valentine, M.C. Hammer.

Now this event has been seriously mis-booked by the Geek Olympics’ organisers, oh, that would be me, never mind then, on with the fun. The Hammer Throw is a simple enough event, pick up the hammer, and throw it as far as you can. Beloved 80’s TV Children’s entertainer Timmy Mallet steps up to the plate, struggles to pick up the hammer, twists around, and flings it wildly, behind him. He scores a mighty throw of -2m. Oh dear. Next up The Hammer Bros from Super Mario Bros step to the plate, pick up the hammer and proceed to throw it in a high arc, straight up, and straight down, but being turtle things, perhaps they don’t fully understand the rules. They score 4m, an improvement, but not much of one.

Next up, Greg ‘The Hammer’ Valentine, who despite his name, has never actually thrown a Hammer. He has put people in figure four leg locks though, and he proceeds to drag M.C. Hammer, proving that you can indeed ‘touch this’, in the middle of the stadium and tries to apply the submission move. Unfortunately for ‘The Hammer’, M.C. Hammer is too legit. Too legit to quit, and as he is wearing frankly ridiculous parachute pants, the figure four is ineffective, M.C. Hammer breaks free and runs off. Greg is shamed and arrested by Green Lantern Security. That leaves Thor. He has brought his own Hammer, which he throws, and it keep going and going and going. Unfortunately, it comes back to his hand. Thor scores 0m. Gold Medal goes to The Hammer Bros. with a mighty 4m.

RUNNING

Flash, Quicksilver, Sonic, Superman.

Everyone seems to love the 100m and stuff like that. Personally I can’t see it. 9.65 secs and it’s all over. So this race will be from the starting point in our Geek Olympic Stadium here in Cardiff, all the way around the world, and back to the stadium. The contestants line up, eagerly awaiting the starter pistol. BOOM! The shot is fired and everyone is off. 9.65 secs later Flash crosses the finish line. Oh. Gold Medal Flash.

ARCHERY

Katniss Everdean, Merida, Robin Hood, The Green Arrow, Hawkeye.

You all know the classic way archery contests are held, same deal here, everyone lines up, and its the person who hits the bullseye most wins. Simple really. Hawkeye goes first, he lines up an arrow, steadies himself and fires. The arrow hits the target, and explodes, destroying the next persons target too. The Green Arrow is pissed. He takes out his arrow, lines up and fires one straight at Hawkeye. Luckily its a boxing glove arrow, it knocks Hawkeye out cold, but with no target to hit, Arrow is shit out of luck.

Robin Hood is fully in flirting mode with both Katniss and Merida, which is frankly, well, a bit dodgy, are they even of age yet? Anyway, so entranced is he with both maidens, he fires wild and misses his target. The fact that he is a cartoon fox didn’t really help matters to be honest either. But there we are. It seems Gold is going to the fairer sex today. Katniss and Merida take turns in firing arrows, both hitting bullseye after bullseye. The deadlock is broken however, when Merida suggest they try to see who is the best an horse archery. She is. And she wins. Katniss is forced to go home empty handed, home to her weird Lady Gaga inspired Capitol City. Gold goes to Merida.

WRESTLING/BOXING/MMA/JUDO/KARATE BASICALLY FUCKING SOMEONE UP

Hulk, Superman, Wonder Woman, The Thing, Jason Statham, Bruce Lee, Rocky, Mr. T, Rowdy Roddy Pipper, Hulk Hogan, The Ultimate Warrior, Andre The Giant, The Rock, Wolverine, Deadpool, Chewbacca, Hagrid, Legolas, Batman, Jon Matrix, Ivan Drago, Indiana Jones, Frankenstein’s Monster, The Wolfman, Bigfoot, Conan, Khal Drogo, A Predator, An Alien and Stone Cold Steve Austin.

This event is basically just a Royal Rumble Event to see who is the hardest Mofo in the universe. I’m not even going to attempt to try an describe the chaos that went down in this event. All super powers, all weapons are allowed, no rules apart from, when you get thrown over the ropes, your out, or if you die in the ring, your out. Simple right. All participants start in the, frankly, massive ring. This goes on for hours, and what initially seemed like a brilliant idea, has become a nightmare. Hours pass, and finally two contestants are left, Jason Statham and Batman. Clearly the two hardest people in the known universe, and the best two at beating the shit out of people.

There can only be one winner though. Both have never been beaten, but Batman is just slightly better, sorry Jason. Batman smashes his opponents face through the mat, and throws him over the ropes, simple, but effective. Gold Medal, and award for best person at fighting ever, Batman. Was there ever any doubt?

With that, our All Geek To Me’s Geek Olympics comes to an end. Thanks for reading. Catch you soon.

WEDNESDAY WHIMSY

By @hmsbeefnuts

 

Welcome to another weekly dose of whimsy, prescribed every Wednesday by yours truly. This week, I shall only deliver a small dose, as I am rather busy with work commitments. But we shall see how far we get. This week has been a sad one for the Geek community as a whole, and the Batman Geek community in particular. I refuse to give any publicity to anyone who commits an atrocity such as the one that happened last Friday, and it sickens me that the news agencies are seeking to exaggerate matters by referring to this sick individual as ‘The Batman Killer’ or ‘The Joker’. Please refrain from using such phrases, it only adds to this guys infamy.

There was of course very happy news in the world of Batman too. The Dark Knight Rises is a fantastic end to Christopher Nolan’s trilogy. I will not review it here, at least not in any detail, until a few more people get to see it. I know Geeky Gem has yet to watch it, as soon as she does, I will write up some more detailed thoughts. I’m happy to say I thought it was fantastic, all the cast were amazing, the storyline was strong, and thankfully I avoided spoilers, which I urge you to do, as at times I was on the edge of my seat wondering what was going to happen next. A very satisfying end to a very satisfying trilogy. I do not envy the guy who has to reboot the Bat now, but I am looking forward to the results. My vote would be to go for a less realistic universe, one in which Superman, Green Lantern, Flash and Wonder Woman can co-exist with Batman, because I want a Justice League Movie.

The Olympics starts on Friday, and to be honest I couldn’t give less of a shit. However, look out for a special series of Geek Olympics that we will be featuring on All Geek To Me, as soon as I can find the time to write them. Time is becoming a real problem at the moment and I am struggling to fit everything in. I had to quit my regular Sunday article at GameNTrain.com due to time constraints, a shame, as I did enjoy writing solely about video games, even if I was having trouble thinking of stuff to write about. I honestly considered The Top 5 Shoes in Gaming. Yeah, I was scraping the barrel. I would like to say thanks to everyone for giving me the opportunity over at GameNTrain, and Eric in particular. Always helpful, always supportive, good people.

I am currently reading Batman : No Man’s Land, which I am enjoying very much, I really need to make a dent in my comics pile, it is getting stupidly huge. I am also still reading Hunting The American Werewolf by Linda S. Godfrey, and yes I have been reading it for far too long. Once again, time is a factor here.

Games wise, I have been having a go at playing Lego Batman 2, and although I enjoy it in parts, it shares the problems that all the Lego games do, i.e., it has an awful camera system, it is very frustrating, and at times down right unfathomable, there are parts that are so obtuse as to be ridiculous. It is all made worthwhile however, by the fact that when you play as Superman, the John Williams theme plays when you fly, and you can shoot down baddies with your laser eyes!!

August is almost here, and we seem to have hit a bit of a movie low point. Most of the big action blockbusters are already out, and there seems like there is nothing really spectacular out  until The Hobbit in December. Of course, I will always find something to watch, practically every week, but all but one of the films I was really looking forward too this year have come out, roll on December.

Well that’s going to have to be it for one week, I have work to do.

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