Hiya all! Caelrona here with another dose of Wednesday Whimsy. This week I actually have some stuff to write about for all of you. It isn’t geeky per-se (although I am making fun of people) but it’s pretty funny, so it should count as whimsical =) I’m not going to talk about geeky goings-ons in my life, because it is just as eventless and boring as it was last week – but about things going on here in my home country of America. Now you might be asking yourself, what could be so interesting in America that I would write a blog post about it? Sports? Nope, not interested in the world of sports even if it is Football season here (For those of you who are not familiar with American Football, it is sort of like Rugby for pussies wearing Kevlar armor with a bunch of rules and regulations that take away all the blood – I mean fun.) Politics maybe? Excuse my language, but hell no. What then, could be so interesting? Stupidity. If there is one thing Americans excel at, it is making absolute fools of themselves, usually over the most amazingly silly things. Most recently it has been over food, which I thought was kind of funny. As a geek I have my favorite gamer snacks, and I’m sure you do too. But I certainly am not going to rage or pay out the nose to get them. Anyway it’s always fun to laugh at stupidity together, so I thought I’d share it with you so that you can laugh at it with me.
Hostess is going out of business. The maker of spongy, sugary, sinfully delicious and fattening snack cakes and pastries is closing. If you don’t know who Hostess is, I’ll wait while you go google it. Try searching the words Twinkie, Zebra Cakes, Snowballs, Ho-Hos, DingDongs and Zingers. Or you could check out the movie Zombieland. One of the main themes in the movie is Tallahassee trying to get his hands on a Twinkie. But why is this big news? Why is this even news at all?! I have no idea, but it is making headlines all across America. I guess people love their snack cakes a little more than I do. Whatever the reasons, people have been going nuts ever since the headlines were posted. Stores have been ransacked of anything with a Hostess label and people have begun posting boxes of the pastries and cakes online (try an ebay search, I dare you) for ridiculous prices. Even worse? People are buying them! When I looked them up on ebay, someone was selling 5 boxes for $80. That is ridiculous profit, because those boxes only cost like $2 at the store. Perhaps the absolute worst thing? People are buying them. Just for shits and giggles I watched that very same auction end – someone bought them. For $80 freakin’ dollars! That’s the price of two used video games right there, or a new one plus a little spare cash. Maybe it’s the geek in me – or it might be because I’ve never been overly fond of Twinkies – but personally I’d rather have the money than the snack cakes.
Among other stupid American news is yet another case of what I can only describe as ‘Holy shit, my country is filled with fuckin’ idiots.’ A very popular (overpriced, douchbaggy, ‘cool’, hipster, with mediocre drinks) coffee house franchise has been running out of one of their seasonal drinks very regularly and very quickly, much to the intense displeasure (*cough* profanity screaming anger *cough*) of their customers. It has gotten so bad that it made the national news headlines. Starbucks did so much promotion on the Pumpkin Spice Latte drink (which, I’ll admit is fairly tasty) that they can’t keep their stores stocked with the stuff to make it. They’ve been selling out the same day they get the stuff in – even the powdered instant stuff they sell which normally ends up in the discount bin after New Years has been flying off their shelves – and yet again onto ebay listings. I don’t know what it is, but when people can’t get their junk food (or drink) craving, they will spend crazy amounts of money on that stuff. Tins of the powdered instant stuff are selling on ebay for $20 a pop, when they can be bought at the stores for only $7. Not only that but people are listing recipes on how to make same-tasting Pumpkin Spice Lattes at home. Holy Toledo, people are actually paying for a recipe! The only possible explanation for all of this crap?
I guess it could just be that people are insane. Or stupid; whichever.
Anyway, on a different note of insanity it is November now. I don’t know what that means for other countries, but in America this means two things; Thanksgiving and Black Friday. Nothing really too geeky there, but some fun is to be had anyway. Thanksgiving is all well and good I guess, but I’m most excited about Black Friday. Not because I’m going to be going shopping – but because I’m going to watch the madness on television. Every year it gets better and better. Riots, beatings and all sorts of crazy things go down. According to statistics about 20 people die every year on Black Friday trying to shop. This shit is insane. What should be just a fairly busy shopping day turns into the most wickedly awesome fights and riots ever. Seriously, this is one day of the year that the news is guaranteed to be worth watching. Fights start on Black Friday that put professional pit fighters to shame.
Well, anyway that is what is going on here in America. People are being stupid, and someone somewhere is going to die trying to buy some pajamas. Ahh stupidity – it’s always entertaining! Anyway, I’ve got some more madness to watch so I’ll talk to you next week!
Until next time;
Caelrona – signing off! ❤
Posted in Articles
, Real Life
, wednesday whimsy
and tagged aliens
, Black Friday
, Pumpkin Spice