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Archive for the tag “Halloween”

12 Movies of Christmas: The Nightmare Before Christmas

By Geeky Gem

Well I hope you are enjoying the 12 movies of Christmas, I know I am. Both Hmsbeefnuts and Caelrona have picked movies I like and some I have never seen. So I will try to watch them too. However we are moving on to movie 3 of m choices and it should come as no surprise to many of friends that it is The Nightmare Before Christmas.

I can remember the first time I saw the trailer for this movie, I had been taken to see The Lion King by my parents and this trailer came on I turned to my Dad and said “I have to see that, it looks great” my parents being my parents were forced to watch it in the cinema with me. I loved it and I still do, the story is funny and the songs are fantastic.  I even went to see a few years ago when it was released in 3D Kirkie Chick and I loved it.

The story is set around this gut above Mr Jack Skellington, who lives in Halloween Town. Naturally they make the holiday of Halloween come to life, however Jack is getting bored with Halloween and yearns for something more. It is then that discovers the holiday town of Christmas and to the surprise of the good people of Halloween town decides they can have Christmas too.

This leads Jack on a path to bring Christmas to the world however his friend Sally has her doubts and is hiding her love for Jack from him and she finds it hard to tell him its a bad idea to attempt Christmas.

Now this movie did come from the mind of Tim Burton however he did not direct it, he left it in the very capable hands of Henry Selick. Tim Burton came up with story and the story was then adopted for screen by Michael McDowell and Caroline Thompson. Danny Elfman was the voice of Jack in this movie and I think he does a brilliant job, he also did some of the songs and that what makes this movie below is the video of my favourite song – Jack’s Lement.

If you haven’t seen this movie and want to watch something light and funny then this is the movie for you.

Wednesday Whismy: Autumn of Terror Special.

Introduction By Hmsbeefnuts

Blog By Caelrona

Hello, and welcome to Wednesday Whimsy, Hmsbeefnuts here. Except, this isn’t any ordinary Wednesday Whimsy. I have spent many months writing blogs for Wednesday, and even longer writing blogs on other days, almost a year in fact, however, things are changing, and change is often a good thing. In this case, the change is good. I will no longer be writing a regular Wednesday blog, I simply don’t have the time in my week now to write 3 blogs a week, so Wednesday has to go. I have changed my job, and have a vastly different social life right now, and time is at a premium, and I dont want to half arse anything. Although I am sad to see my Wednesday slot go, it isn’t all bad news. Caelrona, our semi-regular contributor is stepping up to fill the empty Wednesday slot, and at the same time becoming a full time blogger here at All Geek To Me. I believe that she wants to keep the Wednesday Whimsy title, and she has it, with my blessing, if she so wishes. So I hope you will all join me in welcoming Caelrona to her Wednesday Slot, as we look forward to her future blogs, including the one below. I’ll still be around Monday and Thursday, so you’re not getting away that easy. Enough waffle, here is Caelrona, with her particular brand of stuff.

Hmsbeefnuts

Hiya all! A few words before I begin, perhaps? You might have noticed I’ve not been posting much lately (more on that another day, perhaps?) but I’ve come back with a bit of a bang. Our dear HMS has given up his Wednesday slot here at All Geek To Me, and I’ve stepped in to fill it – we wouldn’t want you missing your Wednesday fill of geek, now would we? I’ll be doing my best to bring you my own brand of whimsy on Wednesdays from here on out, and I shan’t be keeping you reading any longer! Onto the article!

It’s October now and we are creeping steadily closer to Halloween. I know that the holiday isn’t nearly as big in some countries as it is in my home country of America, but it is my favorite holiday. Here in America people start gearing up for Halloween as early as September; and stores start getting ready for it as early as August! Not knowing much about traditions or activities of other countries myself I figured that people from other countries might not know about the huge commercialization, traditions and activities that America has for Halloween; and what better way to geek over my favorite holiday than with a blog post? So here I am, ready to tell you all about some traditional and not-so-traditional Halloween activities from America!

About Halloween

Halloween is known by many names in many places. Halloween, Hallowe’en, All Hallows Eve, and Samhain are all variants of the same holiday (although Samhain can also be considered a slightly different and separate holiday as well.) Whatever you call it, it generally elicits excitement and maybe even fear from most people. Halloween is typically associated with all sorts of supernatural and creepy things like vampires, ghosts and other monsters as well as various occults. Not to mention the various pranks often done by mischievous individuals during the holiday. While highly commercialized to the point of absolute ridiculousness now; the original holiday was for honoring the dead and celebrating the ending of the harvest season.

 

Jack o’Lantern Carving

Originally brought to America from Irish immigrants, Jack o’Lantern carving is a must-do for Halloween celebration all over America. While Jack o’Lanterns are typically carved in pumpkins or other gourds; early versions of the Jack o’Lantern were carved in turnips, beets and potatoes. This changed when Irish immigrants brought the practice to America and discovered that pumpkins make fantastic Jack o’Lanterns. Many different types of contests are held regarding pumpkins and Jack o’Lanterns; ranging from carving contests to see who can make the most scary/original/whatever face or design to pumpkin growing contests where pumpkins can reach absolutely gigantic proportions. The World Record for the largest Jack o’Lantern was carved from a pumpkin weighing in at a massive 1,469 lbs (666.33 kg); and the World Record for the most Jack o’Lanterns lit at one time is 30,919! That is a whole lot of pumpkins!

Pumpkins of all sizes and types for carving and decoration (with paint/stickers/whatever) can be found in almost any store that sells produce during the month of October. Many children grow up carving pumpkins into fanciful faces and designs; either in school or with their parents or guardians. I know I massacred more than my fair share of gourds in my lifetime, and will continue to do so as the years march on! Turning a pumpkin into a Jack o’Lantern is one Halloween tradition I will never forget. Plus when you’re done you can bake pumpkin seeds and pumpkin cookies or pie from the insides! Double win!

Costumes

Costumes being worn for Halloween are a fairly recent development and have a short history. The earliest recording of costumes being worn for the holiday are from Scotland in 1895; other countries don’t have recordings of it until 1900. Early costumes emphasized the pagan and Gothic nature of the holiday, but by the 1930’s costumes based on characters in mass media became popular. Early Halloween costumes were aimed at children, however after the mid-20th century Halloween has increasingly been celebrated by adults. Now Halloween costumes are worn just as much by adults as children, and costumes are available for nearly anything you can think up!

I’ve been dressing up for Halloween since I was a baby. While now-a-days my costumes are only worn during Halloween parties, I spent plenty of time in my earlier years romping about town in my costume collecting candy. Costumes are a huge part of Halloween here in America, and as such have turned into a huge industry. Most stores start pushing costumes early in September, and some special stores even open up just for Halloween to sell costumes. Having worked at one such store, I can tell you from experience that people will drop hundreds of dollars (USD) on costumes and accessories! Most schools even allow children to wear their Halloween costumes on Halloween and have a special parade and party complete with a costume contest! Dedicated costumers will work on handmade costumes for months before Halloween – sometimes even years for highly detailed ones!

Trick or Treating

Trick or Treating (also known as Guising) is the customary practice of children on Halloween going about in costume to ask for candy. Children in costumes travel from house to house in order to ask for treats such as candy (sometimes money or small toys are also given) with the question“Trick or Treat?” The ‘trick’ is generally an idle threat to perform mischief upon the homeowner if no treat is given, however a great many rebellious children and teenagers pull pranks on Halloween even if treats are given. In America, trick or treat has been a customary Halloween tradition since at least the 1950’s. The rule of thumb for trick or treating in America is that a porch light turned on means the homeowner has candy and is participating. If a porch light is off then the homeowner is not participating in the candy giving.

I spent many hours walking along my neighborhood from house to house, usually followed by my mother in the car, dragging a pillowcase full of loot behind me trick-or-treating on Halloween. When I got a bit older, I often grouped with friends for the going often times bringing in bags and bags of candy. That used to be how it was done (at least when I was growing up); traditionally children would either go trick or treating on their own, walking from house to house in their own neighborhoods or parents would take them around from house to house in their cars. Recently, however, people have been participating in various modified versions of trick or treating in order to protect the children. Parents will form large groups where many children all go at once in a group with several parents supervising, or they do something called ‘Trunk or Treating’ where parents from various community groups or churches will gather together in a parking lot and have children trick or treat at the trunks of their parked cars. Cities will also organize events where children (and their parents) do their trick or treating on a set day a little before Halloween.

Haunted Houses

No, not those kind of Haunted Houses; no paranormal investigation here. I’m actually referring to Haunted Attractions of any kind. There are many types of Haunted Attractions, including (but not limited to); Haunted Houses, Haunted Hayrides, Haunted Trails/Forests, Haunted Theme Parks (Screamparks), Cornfield Mazes, and Ghost Runs. All have their own unique features that make them different; but all are designed to give visitors or customers a thrill and a fright. There is no real known history of when Haunted Attractions began and no known recording of their origins; although there is one that dates from 1915. It wasn’t really until the 1960’s and 1970’s that they began cropping up in towns and cities with regularity.

Haunted Houses now open up in nearly every single town all across America during the month of October and during Halloween. Most schools, churches and large community groups typically create their own Haunted Houses for people to walk through and receive a bit of a fright. There are also numerous attraction parks that host their own Haunted Houses and similar experiences (notably Knott’s Berry Farm’s “Halloween Haunt” or Sixflags’ “FrightFest”) that people can attend for a bit of spooky Halloween fun. I’ve both walked through and participated in my own fair share of Haunted Houses. Good houses can put a right bit of spook into you, along with a great deal of fun. Helping to build and participating in the haunting of the Haunted House is (in my opinion) even more fun. Scaring the pants off of random people, and having them laugh about it and tell you good job instead of yelling at you? Heck yeah!

Anyway; those are just a few Halloween activities from my area of the world. Halloween is my favorite holiday, and I celebrate it with friends who love it just as much as I do; so you can best we always have a frightful good time! It is fantastic fun, and I hope that you now have a better understanding of why my country puts so much emphasis on the night. If not, then maybe you’ll be wanting to celebrate it a bit more yourself then!

Until next time;

Caelrona, signing off! ❤

Autumn of Terror: Spooky Anime

By Caelrona

Hiya all! Caelrona here, and it’s that month – you know, October. The month of my favorite holiday, Halloween; the month of Pumpkin-flavored everything; and the best month for watching scary stuff. It’s sort of this unspoken tradition my friends and I have; Every Halloween we get together and watch scary/gory/horror stuff and eat junk food. It usually ends in at least one of us scared out of our socks, with the others ribbing said scaredy-cat for being such a puss. Usually we just watch random things, however this Halloween I’ve made it my duty to make it an animated horror-fest. I thought I’d share some of the animated spooky fun I’ve come across with ya’ll. On to the anime!

KaKuRenBo

KaKuRenBo, or KaKuRenBo : Hide and Seek as it is known in English was released in 2004 in Japan and 2005 in America. It was produced by Shuuhei Morita and distributed by Central Park Media in the USA or YamatoWorks in Japan. It has a runtime of 25 minutes, which is about as long as an average anime episode; however KaKuRenBo is a self-contained short movie.

KaKuRenBo follows a young boy named Hikkora who joins in a game of Otokoyo to search for his missing sister, a girl name Sorincha. Otokoyo is a game of hide and seek, which is played after dark whilst wearing Kitsune (fox) masks. It is played near abandoned ruins, and the players of this game disappear – never to be seen again. This is because they play their game of Hide and Seek while being followed by several Demons. Children who are caught by the demons are spirited away. Hikkora manages to win his game of Otokoyo only to find out that those who disappear stay that way.

KaKuRenBo is a cute little anime. You find yourself worried for the characters, and sad when they inevitably get taken. It is rather dark, and while the content itself isn’t particularly terrified, I think that kids might get scared by the idea of it, so I wouldn’t allow easily spooked children to watch this. For adults it is a very interesting bit of anime.

Vampire Hunter D

Vampire Hunter D was released in 1985. It was directed by Toyoo Ashida and released by too many companies to count; but most recently by Entertainment. It has a runtime of 80minutes, making it just about an hour and a half of dark fun.

Vampire Hunter D is a dark, brooding sort of anime. It is based on a series of illustrated Japanese novels of the same name, although fans will note the differences between the two. The story begins as our heroine, Doris, is visited by the long-lost vampire Count Magnus Lee who intends to take her as a bride. To defend herself, she ends up hiring our hero, a Vampire Hunter simply named ‘D.’ D quickly becomes embroiled in quite the fiasco, for it isn’t only the Count who wants young Doris. D must rescue her, her young brother and defeat an ancient Vampire Count. It is a good thing that D has a few secrets of his own.

Vampire Hunter D is a cult classic of anime films. If you haven’t seen it.. have you been living under a rock?!? I saw this when I was 9 or 10, as it came on TV randomly and I was all “OOOH.” Fans of the novels might not like the movie because it is not a set adaptation of the novels. However as a stand-alone movie it is quite good. Probably not for kiddies, but anyone mature enough to handle some gore should be good to go.

Blood: The Last Vampire

Blood: The Last Vampire was released in 2000 and produced by Production I.G. It is currently licensed for release by Manga Entertainment. It has a very short run-time of 50 minutes, although it maintains itself as a full animated movie.

Blood: The Last Vampire centers around a young girl named Saya. Despite her young looks, Saya is far more deadly than she seems. With help from an organization known as Red Shield, Saya hunts vampires. Specifically, she hunts Chiropterans, or mutant vampires who can make themselves look human, for there is only one true vampire left in the world – her. The story takes her to the American Yokota Air Base, where Chiropterans have been slaughtering humans. It is her job to take them out – without letting the humans know what is going on.

Gems already mention the prequel anime to this movie that came out some time later. I’ve not watched that, although it looks fairly good. I can tell you, however, that this movie is grand. Short, not much story development, but plenty of chiropteran killing going on. I wouldn’t really consider this scary; but the gore and darkness of the story alone get Halloween mention.

I Luv Halloween

I Luv Halloween was released in 2007 and produced by Menfond Electronics. It was licensed and released by Tokyopop. I can’t seem to find a runtime ANYWHERE for this, so if you want to give it a go then let me know!

I Luv Halloween follows the story of a group of children and their manic, crazy, deadly fun on Halloween. The leader of the group, Finch, has a difficult time keeping everyone in line; particularly his baby sister Moochie, who happens to be a homicidal maniac. Amongst their group there is also Devil Lad, who only ever appears on Halloween to join the fun; Pig Pig, a very.. simple young lad; Mr. Kitty, a perverted rascal; and Spike, Mr. Kitty’s mostly silent younger brother. Their misadventures on Halloween are quite the enjoyable romp.

Not gunna lie here, I read the manga. I actually haven’t been able to find the anime version of this anywhere, except bits on youtube. Even google doesn’t turn up much except for the Manga – it seems the entire internets is trying to strike this anime from the annals of history. I was not really impressed with the anime I did see, so instead I suggest you find the manga. It is adorable. Less ErMahGerdMyEyes and more depraved Calvin and Hobbes. If you’re in to that sort of this, then give it a go. It’s always fun watching cute cherubic kiddies commit murder, right? Or maybe there’s something wrong with me… anyway!

That finishes up my Halloween anime. I was sort of sad to find that there really isn’t much in the way of Halloween anime – seriously people, someone needs to mend this egregious error. I want, nay I demand more Halloween anime! Maybe we should start a petition? Who’ll sign? Anyway, all joking aside, enjoy yourself some spooky anime, and have a Happy Halloween!

Until next time;

Caelrona – signing off! ❤

Autumn of Terror: My Favourite Monsters Part 1

By @hmsbeefnuts

You may have noticed that around All Geek To Me, we like our monsters, we like them quite a bit in fact. As this month is our celebration of all things that go bump in the night, I thought that I couldn’t really let it pass without a look at my favourite monsters, so I wrote something about that very thing. I have picked my favourite iteration of each of these monsters, and as they have been put on screen many times, I hope this adds variety, as I could just choose the Universal or Hammer film versions, but I will try my very best not too. These choices are based on the look alone, film quality does not enter into my choices here, just this is my prefered version of the different monsters mentioned. So with that out the way, lets get on with some monsters.

WEREWOLF

I know the remake of The Wolf Man was not well received, but I liked it, I liked it a whole lot. Now yes, there is some dodgy cgi, but the main Wolf Man suit is quite simply spectacular. I loved it. It takes the look of the Lon Chaney Jnr. version and ups it to new super fearsome and crazy levels. This for me, is the finest example of The Wolf Man, all claws, jaws and ripped clothing. I will always have a soft spot for the 1941 original, but I don’t think you can argue that this design is far more awesome.

HONOURABLE MENTION

Van Helsing is another movie that everyone thought sucked. Well for all the cheese and bad acting, I still liked it. The Wolfman from Van Helsing is supersized, really huge and powerful, but once again, I really dug the design, I would definitely not like to meet this beast on a dark night.

VAMPIRES

For me Bela Lugosi owned the voice, but Christopher Lee owned the physical manifestation of Dracula, and so, as the Lord of all Vampires, he has to be my top pick for best Vampire. Hammer vampires were much scarier than Universal ones, all blood shot eyes and dripping fangs. Christopher Lee was just such a badass as Dracula, the embodiment of evil, however, Hammer did also show a talent for other types of vampires too, as we shall see below…

HONOURABLE MENTION

Hammer ruled the roost in terms of Horror sexiness, and thus any female vampire, bride or victim of Dracula, instantly becomes very appealing, especially Ingrid Pitt. I know it’s shallow and a bit sexist, but fuck it, vampire chicks are hot, and lesbian Hammer vampires are the hottest.

THE MONSTER

The Monster, not Frankenstein, has never been bettered since 1931 and Boris Karloff’s portrayal. The make up is stunning, the acting is amazing, the Universal Monster is the greatest that has ever been, and ever will be. Can’t really say any more than that.

HONOURABLE MENTION

Yes it’s Van Helsing again, but I thought this design of the Monster was unique, I liked the steam punk legs and the glowing brain. He may be a bit theatrical, but then wouldn’t you be if you had been cobbled together from a few dozen other guys?

GHOSTS

Ghost? Demon? Well it’s responsible for Paranormal Activity anyway, so I think it counts. I absolutely loved Paranormal Activity 3, and especially the bit from the picture above. I love how usually the invisible force is scary enough, but I couldn’t resist this sight gag, amazing. Paranormal Activity is so scary because it happens in normal houses to normal people. Those are my favourite kinds of spooky stories, the other being the classic Victorian ghost story.

HONOURABLE MENTION

The Woman in Black was a great return to form for the bleak and depressing Victorian Ghost Story, and is a great example of such a ghost. Vengeful, scary, and a bit of a dick.

SWAMP CREATURE

Universal’s Creature From The Black Lagoon, or Gill Man, if you prefer, is the classic beastie from the depths. It’s a great look for a sea monster, webbed feet and claws, and slimy skin. Enough to make you think twice about swimming in that lake or river.

HONOURABLE MENTION

Maybe not a typical Gill Man, however, the Fluke Man is disgustingly scary. One of the most memorable monsters from the X – Files, Fluke Man was horrendous. Just look at him. That shit is fucked up.

Autumn of Terror: Killer Killers

By Geeky Gem

We all love a good horror, well people who like horror like a good horror movie. Now a horror movie wouldn’t be a horror movie with out some deranged killer on the loose would be, so here we are going to have a look at just a few.

Leatherface – Texas Chain Saw Massacre

Leatherface is firstly a killer, secondly he gets his name from the fact he wears a mask made from human skin. These are the first two things you need to know about Leatherface, the others are that he likes eat people and share them with his family. I think that’s really all we need to know and that’s enough. Leatherface was first played by Gunner Hannsen.

Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

Freddy Krueger I think will be one of the all time killer’s in movies. I can’t think of a person who doesn’t know this dream killer. Bought to the screen by Wes Craven and played by the scary as hell Robert Englund Freddy was the think of Nightmare on Elm Street and beyond. I’ve seen all of these movies and each one gets a little stranger but that’s not to say they aren’t good. Freddy even gets his own rhyme, which is kinda cool. However we must never forget why he is a killer in the first place, he killed children and then the angry Parents killed him and so his spirit can now only kill in dreams.

Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th

I know, I know Jason wasnt the killer in the first movie his mother Mrs Voorhees was but I couldn’t have this list with out him. Jason has been played by many people but the most well-known of these guys is Kane Hodder who played him for four movies. Jason is only seen in the first movie in the memories of his mother and the nightmares of Alice. It later turns out he is in fact alive and knows his mother is dead so goes about trying to kill Alice. Jason is best known to us for wearing a hockey mask and carrying a ruddy big machete.

Michael Myers – Halloween

Michael Myers is best known for helping Jamie-Lee Curtis scream real loud and make my best screams list. Well that’s not true really, He was bought to life by John Carpenter and played by Nick Castle for most of the first film, he carry on to hunt Laurie for a few of films including Halloween H2O. Not sure why, but he does plus he has a really big knife. No remember you can shot him and make sure he falls out  second story window but this doesn’t mean he’s dead.

Ghost Face – Scream

Ghostface was a killer for a new generation, when Scream first came out we were all still living in the world of Jason and Freddy and although these slasher movies were good we need some new blood as it were. That’s where Wes Caravan came back in and bought us Ghostface and the terror of Woodsboro. Ghost Face seems to want to kill Sidney Prescott and the details emerge with each movie as to way. In the first film Ghostface is played by Skeet Ulrich along with Matthew Lillard, who’s character’s created the identity in order to kill Sidney because of her mother’s affair with Billy’s father. After that it was played by two different characters in each movie with numerous red herrings throughout the movies. However the voice has always been played by Roger L. Jackson, Ghostface uses a voice changer to hide his voice and kills his victims with a hunting knife.

There we have it folks, a brief look at just some serial killers that have stalked babysitter’s, telephoned their victims and given them a pop quiz. They have also drowned in lakes and come back to life, used human skin to mask their faces and haunted dreams to scary you to death. So untill next time I suggest you read up on the rules and make sure your safe to close your eyes.

Autumn of Terror: Top 5 Screams

By Geeky Gem

As Autumn of Terror goes on I thought it best to make a clip blog of the best screams in horror movies. There is nothing better than having a giggle as people scream in movies at things that have scared them or are trying to kill tem. I don’t scare easy so this always makes me giggle, here are some of the ones I liked most.

Halloween – Jamie Lee Curtis

Where better to start than with the woman be call the scream queen. Jamie Lee has been in so many horror movies I think she had screaming down to a t. Here is the chase scene from Halloween, just for you to see what I mean.

Scream – Drew Barrymore

Scream was one of the first horror movies, that I bought on video. This was surely down to the fact that I thought it was really good and kind of funny as the movie was intended to be a spoof movie but became so much more. It was horror for a whole new generation, a generation that knew the rules for horror movies. Here is the clip that opened the movie and saw Drew Barrymore scream her guts up, literally.

Evil Dead – Bruce Campbell

I love Bruce Campbell, if you follow him on Twitter he is really funny and even answers fan’s questions when he can. I also love the Evil Dead, Sam Raimi just made this movie on a show string and its fantastic. This clip shows some of Bruce’s best screams.

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre – Marilyn Burns

I had originally picked The Wicker Man to go here, but just before posting I changed my mind. This movie made my banned list eariler in the week, so I picked the dinner scene for you to enjoy. Marilyn Burns screams a lot in this scene, so its worth a watch.

Scream of Fear – Susan Strasberg

I couldn’t very well have a list of screams and not included one from the home of horror Hammer. It took me a while to find one I really liked but in the end I picked Scream of fear. The screams in this are fantastic, I have chosen to show you trailer here.

There we have it folks a whole lot of screaming going on, my thorat is sore after all that. Until next time take care.

Autumn of Terror: There’s Something in The Woods…

By @hmsbeefnuts

Here at All Geek To Me, we love our horror, almost as much as we love Superheroes, and Batman, but not quite. However, in line with our previous month long special events, Avenging April and Summer Knights, we have decided that October, the spookiest month of the year, shall be dubbed The Autumn of Terror here at AGTM.

Why Autumn of Terror? Well it’s a reference to the late Summer and Autumn of 1888, which in London became known as The Autumn of Terror due to Jack the Ripper. I personally find the mystery of who Jack the Ripper was fascinating, and as it was now 124 years ago, we felt that using the name Autumn of Terror was perfectly fine. There will (hopefully) be an article all about Jack the Ripper up-coming, as soon as I write it, as well as a month full of horror movies, books, monsters, ghosts, and things that go bump in the night. It is only 30 days now until All Hallows Eve, when the restless spirits of the dead search the Earth for… ummm, pumpkins, or something I guess? They are definitely after something, so let’s get prepared as we dip into our first serving of the Autumn of Terror, I hope you enjoy this month…

I thought I would kick off AOT with a look at ‘real’ life monsters, things that go bump in the night, and the creatures that are said to inhabit the darkest and most remote places on Earth. Cryptozoology is the study of hidden animals, and there are genuine people who search for these creatures, known as cryptozoologists. Now I know that it is very unlikely that any of these creatures exist, yet people have seen them for hundreds of years, and in some cases, hundreds of times in one year. Who is to say that these creatures can not be real? People are seeing something, and the next time you find yourself in the woods, or on a lake, it may be worth being a little bit more cautious. You wouldn’t want to end up as a Sasquatch’s lunch…

LAKE MONSTERS

Nessie, or the Loch Ness Monster is the daddy of the lake monster class of monsters. First seen in the 6th Century AD by St. Columba, the monster didn’t really hit it’s stride until the 1930’s When a new road opened the Loch up to passing motorists. Every year tourists flock to the Loch in search of the monster, and there are sightings every year. Numerous searches have proved fruitless, but there are said to be caves under the Loch that link it to the sea, so maybe Nessie goes back and forth? Whatever the truth, I don’t think I’d like to swim across the Loch, and not just because it friggin’ massive either.

Lake Champlain also has a monster, this one dubbed Champie. First seen in 1883, there have been over 300 reported sightings of this Plesiosaur like animal, with no reported injuries to humans, but the important part of that phrase is ‘reported’.

BIG HAIRY MONSTERS

My personal favourite cryptid is Bigfoot. The picture above is taken from the Patterson/Gimlin film from 1966 the most famous piece of footage for any cryptid. Bigfoot, or Sasquatch has been seen for hundreds of years and is the best shout on this list for actually being real, along with his cousin the Yeti. Reports have stated that Bigfoots have kidnapped people, attacked people and are generally not a good a creature one should piss off. Around 8ft tall and hugely muscled, strong and fast, the Bigfoot isn’t a monster to be messed with.

The Yeti is a Bigfoot type creature found in the snows of Tibet as well as the temperate valleys. Also known as the Abominable Snowman, foot prints have been found in the snows since the 1920’s, but perhaps the best evidence comes from below the snow level, where the Yeti are said to spend most of their time in the forests and jungles. Makes sense really, I bet it damn cold up there, even if you have those big furry coats.

OTHER MONSTERS OF NOTE

In Britain we have our fair share of cryptids. There are said to be Bigfoot creatures seen on Scottish mountains, lake monsters and sea serpents aplenty, but perhaps the most common cryptid is the ABC (Alien Big Cat). Now it is quite reasonable to suggest that a population of big cats, perhaps puma or even panther do survive and prosper throughout the UK. Certainly many farmers have seen the damage that these beasts have done to their livestock. The Beast of Bodmin Moor, The Surrey Puma, and even the Essex Lion have all made headlines in recent years. Think twice before taking a walk alone in the countryside…

Many hundreds of people have also reportedly seen werewolves, yes, werewolves. Now this stretches credibility a bit far, but many rational people around America have seen a large wolf-like creature that walks on two legs. I should know, I read a book on it. Theories range from an adapted form of wolf, to a spirit animal, and everything in between, however, one man was reportedly attacked by one, so you know, maybe it was a bear or something, but maybe, just maybe it was a werewolf?

Mokele Mbembee is a surviving dinosaur said to live in the Congo jungles. A creature feared by locals, it is said to upturn boats, drowning those inside. Usually described as a long necked type dinosaur, like an Apatosaurus, which was a herbivore, perhaps the Mokele Mbembee has adapted to feast on the flesh of drowning locals?

The Jersey Devil is said to haunt the Pine Barrens of New Jersey, and woe betide any traveler who meets this horrific creature on their journey.

The Thunderbird is from Native American legend, and is a beast who is said to bring thunder and storms. Even though this creature is firmly set in myth, people do report seeing gigantic birds in the skies of remote parts of America, and there have also been reports of such birds attacking people.

People also from time to time report seeing much larger versions of regular animals. One such example are wolves. From time to time people are reporting seeing wolves of gigantic size, wolves that bear a striking resemblance to Dire Wolves, a now extinct, (or is it?) species of wolf that hunted the American forests thousands of years ago. The Dire Wolf is strong, quick and fierce and is much bigger than any known wolf today, not the kind of creature you want to meet on your way to Grandmothers house…

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