All Geek To Me

Pure Geekness

Archive for the tag “summer”

WEDNESDAY WHIMSY

By @hmsbeefnuts

This weeks Wednesday Whimsy will be an ode to holidays. Not the kind of holiday where you board a plane and jet off to exotic places for a week or two, and certainly not a celebration of some religious event (for that is where holiday gets its origin, holiday/holy-day, your welcome fact fans). This year I have a week off, one whole week away from work, where I get to do exactly what I want for a whole week, exciting huh? Well it is for me. So far, we are a day in, and I have slept in and gone to the cinema and made some nice food, and taken my dog for long walks. Pretty good so far. But I thought I’d let you know about what else I have planned for the week, at least in a geek context, let the Summer of Jon commence!

As I mentioned above, I saw Brave yesterday. A lot of people are hating on this film, but for me, Brave is one of, if not the, best Pixar film. The animation is obviously stunning, as usual, but the theme of the film is right up my alley. The ancient Scottish wilderness is simply beautiful, stunning hills and mountains, picturesque forests and castles and brilliantly rendered characters, many of which are memorable. The protagonist herself, Merida, is a strong female role model, and one of the most likeable animated characters in a while. Sure, the story is pretty basic, we all learn a valuable lesson in the end, but then it must be remembered that this is a kids film, and although it doesn’t stray far from typical fairytale plot points, including a witch, although, not all that wicked, this is no bad thing. Sometimes the simplest stories are the best.

Perhaps the most ‘Disney’ of the Pixar films, Merida should fit nicely into the Disney Princess Sorority, even if she is very ballsy and would destroy Katniss Everdeen in an archery competition. I’m a fan of fairy stories, myths and legends, and Brave defiantly feels like it belongs in such illustrious company. I saw Brave in a room full of excited kids and not so excited parents, but everyone left the theatre smiling. The film had good action scenes, was scary enough just to put an edge on proceedings, and I’ll admit it, quite heart warming at times. I went to see this with my Mum, and there is not a better person you could take with you to see this, go take your Mum now. I’ll admit it, I’m not a fawning Pixar fan, I like The Incredibles, Nemo and Monster Inc. but hate Toy Story, Cars, Wall-E and Ratatouille. Brave however, did it for me, top marks Pixar.

Today I returned to the Cinema, this time for The Bourne Legacy. I had enjoyed all The Bourne films thus far, and am happy to say this continued with this new direction for the franchise. Taking place during the events of the previous films, The Bourne Legacy widens and enhances the Bourne Universe, revealing that the secret goings on of Treadstone etc. go way beyond Mr. Bourne. Hawkeye himself, Jeremy Renner is our hero and he handles himself superbly, even coming close to a certain Mr Neeson in one specific wolf fighting scene. It seems that wolves are the go to animal for putting main characters in danger. As is usual in these kind of spy films, characters all talk very quickly about secret organisations with amazing names and codewords, I love all that stuff. Ed Norton is the man charged with bad guy duties, and he does a reasonable job of trying to track Renner down. The beautiful and amazing Rachel Weisz is on hand to scream a bit, then lend a hand, and maybe become a bit of a love interest at the end. The action is typical of The Bourne Franchise, all parkour running about, bike chases and slick taking people down with no fuss.

The film is perfectly watch-able and enjoyable, but I do think that I should have perhaps re-watched the previous films, just to keep things fresh in my mind, however, if this is your first Bourne film, it wouldn’t be too confusing, although you may wonder why Matt Damon is reduced to a few black and white picture cameos. By no means a great film, but I enjoyed it and would watch a further sequel, and isn’t that all a film really needs to accomplish. Worth my time and money.

Later on this week I plan on seeing The Expendables 2, and that should be enough cinema for anyone in one holiday. Anyway, that’s enough chatter about me, I would also like to comment on All Geek To Me as a whole. Geeky Gem and I would like to extend our sincerest thanks to everyone who has read, commented or licked a link to All Geek To Me over the past 8 months. On Sunday we hit a huge landmark of 25,000 views, we broke our weekly view record with a very respectable 1,921 views and also beat our previous daily record of views with a fantastic 368 in one day. So a massive thank you once again. I really don’t think either Geeky Gem or I ever thought we would get 1,000 views, let alone 25,000 so we are very grateful to you all. I’ll catch you next week with some more rubbish about something I haven’t thought of yet, catch you guys later.

 

Avenging April: What All The Fuss Was About: Avengers Assessments

By @hmsbeefnuts

Thursday afternoon, April 26th , I watched The Avengers, it was around 3 hours ago now that the film finished, and I’m still buzzing from the spectacle. Rest assured that The Avengers is very very good indeed. Everything that the previous 5 Marvel films promised, has been fulfilled by what is quite simply one of the most spectacular films that I have ever seen. Now I know I’m still buzzing from the film, a lot of what I type may be new film glaze, but I don’t think so. I will be seeing the film again on Saturday, this time in IMAX 3D, and I can’t wait, but we shall see if the aura of the Avengers will diminish the second time. I seriously doubt it.

I will not spoil plot points or secrets with you here, I think it’s only fair if you experience it all yourself, and there are plenty of reviews to read around the web anyway full of spoilers. Also, I’m not the kind of fan boy who wants to declare a winner of the summer, I’m not going to decry Amazing Spider-man, or The Dark Knight Rises. The Avengers may be the most spectacular film this summer, especially for comic fans, but I’m sure The Dark Knight is going to be equally as great, and Amazing Spider-man, well, here’s hoping. What I will say is, if you have ever enjoyed a Marvel film, then go and see this on the big screen, it needs to be seen big, and loud, do not wait for Blu-ray, DVD, or TV.

 

As my oldest mate and I sat in the cinema before hand, I was slightly apprehensive. Could this film live up to my incredibly high expectations? I needn’t have worried, Avengers delivered, and delivered big. If I can interject here with a point. This is the kind of film that is best enjoyed with your friends, or loved ones. Go see it in a big group, go see it with your childhood friend, go see it with your kids or little brother and sister. There are few things I enjoy more than seeing a brilliant film with a mate, a girlfriend, my Mum, or Dad, Avengers is that kind of film. It is a visual expression of childhood glee, it is every game you played in the playground, arguing over who would be Thor, or The Hulk. I can’t believe that Marvel and Joss Whedon pulled it off, something that should have been very hard, almost impossible.

All the heroes get their moment to shine, even those with out powers. Whedon pulls off the group dynamic perfectly. These heroes aren’t friends, they argue, they fight, but when it comes to the crunch, they pull together and kick some major bad guy ass. I don’t know what my favourite bit was, there were so many. Hulk and Thor, Hulk and Loki, Cap and Agent Coulson, any time Tony Stark is on screen. It would have been easy to turn this into Ironman 3, or the Tony Stark show, but it is not that at all.

The Hulk could be the star, certainly, I felt that he had many of the greatest moments. The BEST Hulk in anything ever, there simply has to be a Hulk sequel with this Hulk, he was awesome. The CGI was incredible, and suitably epic. I’m finding it very hard to talk about things without spoiling stuff, so I will try to not go on for too long. I can’t wait to see where the Marvel films go next, now that The Avengers are established, I can’t wait to see an Ironman 3, Thor 2, Cap 2 and Hulk 2 (3?), and a sequel to The Avengers. Marvel have done something incredible with these films, a fan boys wet dream. Right now I would say that this is my favourite Marvel film, overtaking Captain America, but a second, third and fourth viewing will confirm this. As for now, all I can say is that The Avengers is worth your money, worth your time and worth your attention. DC should be taking notes from Marvel. I want to see a Justice League movie that is this good. I want to see Batman, Green Lantern and Superman working together as well as Ironman, Cap and Hulk. With Nolan’s take on Batman coming to an end, and a reboot for the Bat franchise probably in the works, now is the time to lay the foundations of a Justice League team up movie. I liked Green Lantern, I have high hopes for Man of Steel, lets hope DC can do as good a job as Marvel, even though they seemingly have a harder task, with DC heroes being slightly harder to translate.

Writing this has made me want to go and see it again. I can’t wait until Saturday. The Summer is shaping up to be epic. The Avengers is a hard act to follow, but I can’t wait to see what Marvel has in store.

How Bigfoot Can Save Hollywood

By Hmsbeefnuts

Hollywood loves the reboot, the re-imagining, the sequel. In recent years almost every blockbuster that has emerged has been one of these, or has been seen as the start of a franchise. There is nothing whatsoever wrong with this. I love sequels, as long as they are worthwhile, and I love reboots, Batman Begins was a fantastic fresh start for the Bat franchise and everything has since gone swimmingly. However, there is a trend that Hollywood seems to repeat, and this is, the unnecessary reboot or sexual. Step forward Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and especially you Amazing Spider-man, its time someone put a stop to you.

Now this is a very personal beef that I have with these two films, and I can understand if you don’t feel the same way, understand, but never forgive. Lets start with crystal skull, I’m not putting the title in upper case, it doesn’t deserve it. Now I will admit to being very excited for the new Indy adventure, but little did I know that it was as no more than a cash grab, the story was terrible and it almost tarnished three perfect films from my childhood, but it didn’t, Lucas and Spielberg didn’t rape my childhood, but they did waste a shit load of money, something we will return to later. Lets take the worst offender, the object of my geek rage, The Amazing Spider-man. In 2002, Sam Raimi directed a very good film Spider-man, the story of a boy who once bitten by a radioactive, or genetically modified spider, gain the super human ability of said arachnid. He followed this origin tale with two further films, one very good sequel, and a poor third entry that still made killer box office.

Due to critical reviews, Sony pictures decided to reboot the Spider-man franchise, and so in just under 10 years, the cinema going public will get to see two origin stories for Spider-man. This is uncalled for. By now everyone who cares knows how Spider-man became Spider-man, we get it, we know, stop wasting time re-telling the story and get on with a good film. But no, we get to see a slightly different take on Spider-man’s origin. Now don’t get me wrong, the film might be great, but the trailer looks a bit dark and depressing, but what I’m trying to get over is that the $100 odd million spent on this new film could have gone to something else, something new, or at least, something that hasn’t been tried in more than 20 years. Step forward Sasquatch…

There have been many Bigfoot and Yeti films over the years, but all bar one share a commonality, they are all low-budget B movies that are never really satisfying. The suits are awful, the acting sub-par and the whole thing comes across as disappointing. The exception obviously is our friend Harry above. Harry and the Hendersons is a fantastic film. I loved it when I was young and I think it is down to it and a few books on unexplained mysteries, that I love Bigfoot to this day. The film s high budget, the suit looks amazing, unequalled to this day, and the acting is great, because great actors were in it. However, there is something about it that doesn’t quite sit right with an older me. Harry is adorable and the film is a funtastic ride to jolly town, but guess what? I want a companion piece. I want a scary fall into the horror ravine, and I want to be pushed over the edge by a big budget, scary ass Bigfoot. The world is crying out for a great scary Bigfoot movie. How do I know this? Well I bet I’ve seen more films about Bigfoot than most people knew existed, and I don’t say this to boast, only an idiot would boast about that when he had to endure some of the shit I’ve sat through. I say this because, there is clearly a market for scary films about Bigfoot, so now, someone needs to stop making shitty reboots and sequels, and front up the money for a great Sasquatch movie. Lets look at some of the films that have come before…

Sasquatch Films that are Rubbish…

I have seen many bad Sasquatch films, these include, but are not limited to;

The Snow Creature (W Lee Wilder, 1954)

Shriek of the Mutilated (Michael Findlay, 1974)

The Capture of Bigfoot (Bill Rebane, 1979)

I will not review these films but they are all terrible, acting, beast suit everything a complete waste of time.

Sasquatch Films that are OK…

Snowbeast (Herb Wallerstein, 1977, TV movie)

The Legend of Boggy Creek (Charles B Pierce, 1973)

Clawed: The Legend of Sasquatch (2005)

Savage (2009)

These films are OK if you’re in the mood and like shitty horror films, maybe.

Sasquatch Films that are Decent to Good…

Harry and the Hendersons/Bigfoot and the Hendersons (William Dear, 1987)

The Abominable Snowman/The Abominable Snowman of the Himalayas (Val Guest, 1957, UK)

Abominable (2006)

These films are worth seeing and are actually quite good.

OK so we have established that Bigfoot films are popular with some sort of audience and that there is room for a high budget take on the Sasquatch legend that isn’t a cute comedy, and will scare the bejeezus out of people. Some more evidence? Horror is big business, look at Paranormal Activity and Saw, audiences lap up horror movies. Also, Bigfoot is a recognisable character in pop culture, that no one actually owns the rights to, this means anyone can make a film about him, and it has the potential to be successful. OK, how though? How is a Bigfoot film going to make it worthwhile for an audience and a studio? Well it just so happens that I have come up with three solid gold concepts. Ready children? Then I shall begin…

Concept 1) Bigfoot the slasher, or Scream for Bigfoot

OK simple enough premise. Sexy teens go into the woods for summer camp/spring break, and disturb something in the woods they shouldn’t. Get Kevin Williamson to write the script, known good-looking actors and spend money on the creature, a post modern Bigfoot hit is likely to follow. Easy.

Concept 2) Bigfoot the found footage film.

This will take the style and story of The Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity films, and feature a documentary crew who venture out into the woods making a documentary on a logging company. A year later their footage is found, but they are not, guess who they pissed off?

Concept 3) The Historical Bigfoot epic

I must admit this is a bit of a favourite of mine and I’ve had this idea in mind for a few years now. Colonial America. As the French and British fight over who controls the new world a small settlement is set up on the boarders of a dense forest. Indian Legends say that something they fear to name lives in these dense woods, they so fear it that they dare not live within miles of the forest. The settlement grows and builds a fort, in preparation for the winter months and everything seems normal, except a few members of hunting parties never return. The leaders put this down to desertion or Indian War parties, that is until winter draws in and the real culprits are revealed. Can the Fort hold out until the early spring when the mountain passes open and fresh troops can arrive with supplies? Or will the Sasquatch get their terrible revenge for the disturbance of their habitat?

So there we are. That’s how Bigfoot can save Hollywood from an endless stream of reboots and shitty sequels. Right, who’s gona stump up $300 million so I can do concept three justice? Anyone…

Post Navigation